Afraid to Fall
by Pyewacket75
Summary: Co-written with the lovely Hughville, this is a slightly AU story about Cameron returning to PPTH in season 4 without Chase. It was inspired by the song "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri and I felt it was a total House/Cameron song. Hughville agreed. And so it was written :) Rated T for now but that will change soon enough. Muahaha. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: We're back! Muahahaha! I was inspired for this story when I heard the song "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri and I knew I had to write it with none other than Hughville. So here it is. The first few lines that begin the chapter are from that song. Enjoy!**_

 **Chapter One**

 _How can I love when I'm afraid to fall_

 _But watching you stand alone_

 _All of my doubt, suddenly goes away somehow_

 _One step closer..._

Chase leaned against the doorjamb watching Cameron pack. He folded his arms and narrowed his eyes. Yesterday she told him she couldn't do this any longer; "this" being their relationship. They argued for hours until he finally gave in. Since they started dating, he always knew in the back of his mind she would leave him. The fact she was going back to Princeton didn't surprise him. Cuddy called them both and offered them jobs; him one in surgery and Cameron one as head of the ER. He declined Cuddy's offer because he liked living in Phoenix. It never snowed. The hospital he worked at was one of the best in the country. Best of all, he didn't have to live and work in House's shadow. Cameron accepted the offer. Chase knew she was unhappy with her job at a private clinic. He knew she missed the excitement of solving medical puzzles. Time and time again, he encouraged her to apply to other hospitals in the city. She did but never got hired which just made things worse. He knew she missed the change of seasons, living closer to her family, and the friends she made in New Jersey. He tried to be enough for her but he wasn't. Only one man was enough for her and it pissed him off she was going back to House.

"He isn't going to care that you're back," he said sullenly as she closed her last suitcase.

"Who?" she asked as she lifted the case from the bed. Her long blonde hair swung forward covering her face.

"Don't."

She carried her case past him into the living room and he followed her. Placing it beside the other two by the front door, she turned to look at him.

"Don't what?" she asked as she tilted her head.

"Act like you don't know who I'm talking about," he told her as he put his hands on his hips. "House isn't going to care that you're back. He told you he didn't like you. He didn't try to stop you when you left. Foreman says he's interested in Cuddy." His gaze raked over her slender body. "We both know you can't compete with Cuddy."

It was cruel and he knew it but he didn't care. He wanted to hurt her the way she was hurting him.

A honk sounded and she shook her head. "Are you going to help me take my suitcases out to the cab?"

"No."

She shrugged, grabbed her purse and opened the front door. Picking up two of the cases, she walked out into the dry, intense heat. With a sigh of defeat, Chase picked up the third case and followed her. The driver opened the trunk and she carefully placed her cases in while Chase slung the third one in with a thud. He slammed the trunk shut and squinted at her. The sunlight was bright and she pulled a pair of sunglasses out of her bag. Putting them on, she looked at him.

"Don't be like this," she sighed. "I'll miss you."

He turned and walked back to the house. As he opened the door, he heard the cab drive away.

* * *

Cameron smoothed her khaki skirt and entered the lobby of PPTH. Since arriving at the hospital three weeks earlier, she saw House but he didn't see her. She even sent a patient to him but he didn't try to find her. She tried to convince herself she didn't care but it bothered her. Of course, she spent most of her time in the emergency room or in Cuddy's office working to make it more efficient. She was due for another meeting with Cuddy in five minutes. Tucking her hair behind her ear, she entered the clinic.

House watched the three minions vying for a spot on his team. They were attempting to get his patient out of the chapel where she'd locked herself in. House was annoyed and turned away from them. Looking down into the lobby, he saw Cameron. At least he thought it was Cameron. The woman dressed like her and looked like her except for the long blonde hair. He knew it couldn't be Cameron because she left to live with Chase. He watched as the woman tucked a strand of hair behind her ear the way Cameron did. Then she disappeared into the clinic.

If Cameron was back, he'd know about it. He knew about everything going on at the hospital. Well, everything that interested him anyway. His patient burst through the doors at that point and he turned his attention back to his wannabe team members who finally managed to sedate her. The blonde Cameron clone puzzle would have to wait.

A week later House stood in the doorway of the emergency room. It was not the chaotic mess he was used to. A sense of calm pervaded the room and he saw her. She wore a white lab coat over pink scrubs and had her back to him. As if she could sense him, she turned and walked toward him. It _was_ Cameron. Her long blonde hair tumbled over her shoulders. She smiled at him.

"Three weeks," she said as she held up three fingers. "Took you long enough," she teased as she stopped in front of him. "For someone who notices everything, you missed something big."

"Patient finally told me who sent her to me," he said as she scrutinized her. "You're an idiot."

"Where I'm working, my hair or the fact I left Chase?" she asked with a cheeky grin.

"The hair makes you look like a hooker. I like it," he said with a look of pure excitement. It disappeared quickly as he looked around. "You're wasted down here, pulling glass out of idiots who can't drive or sewing up morons who lost their fingertips."

"I can do good here. Get it out of my system."

"Poor Chase," he said with a click of his tongue and a shake of his head. "What happened there? I thought you two were going to set the world on fire, and all that crap."

She shrugged. "I didn't like Phoenix. Too hot, too far away from everything and everyone." _Especially you,_ she thought to herself.

"Who doesn't like Phoenix? Where else can you wear shorts twenty-four hours a day?"

"You can do that here in summer," she laughed. "But yeah, I missed the seasons. In Arizona, there's just spring and summer. I like fall and winter."

"Uh-huh. I'm sure Cuddy really had to twist your arm to get you to come back."

"Nope. She offered Chase a job in surgery as well but he turned it down. He likes the Mayo Clinic and the people. He makes a lot of money so he feels at home there."

"Of course." Just then, his pager went off and he checked it. "My ducklings beckon." Without another word, he turned and quickly limped away while she watched him. Her heart, beating loudly in her ears since he showed up, slowly returned to normal and she took a deep breath to steady herself. _Jesus, Allison, get a grip,_ she muttered under her breath as she returned to the patients of the ER.


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: We're glad you liked the first chapter :) Thank you to those who left kind words :)**_

 **Chapter Two**

 _Who do you think you are?_

 _Runnin' 'round leaving scars_

 _Collecting your jar of hearts_

 _And tearing love apart_

 _You're gonna catch a cold_

 _From the ice inside your soul_

 _So don't come back for me_

 _Who do you think you are?_

House went to Wilson's office after dealing with his patient, and let himself in.

"Busy, House," Wilson muttered as he made notes in a chart.

"Cameron's back."

Wilson stopped writing and looked up. "You saw her?"

"Yeah. She's working in the ER. My question is why you didn't say something when I told you I thought I saw her the other day? You made me feel like I was crazy. What's up with that?"

"She didn't want a big fanfare about her return and she wanted to get comfortable with the job first without you coming down there to bother her every day."

House couldn't deny the hurt he felt by that comment, but shrugged it off. If that's the way she wanted it, he'd leave her alone. He went back to his office, put on a jazz album, sat back in his chair and closed his eyes as he waited for his team to return.

It was the third delivery of flowers that made Cameron decide she had enough. When she had a break, she called Chase, knowing he'd be at work.

"What are you doing?" she demanded. "Did you think sending me flowers was going to make me change my mind and come back to Phoenix?"

There was a pause, but then he spoke. "I know you like flowers. Besides, it's Tuesday and I miss you."

"That's all well and good but it's not going to make me come back. My life is here, Chase."

"And so is House."

"What does House have to do with anything?" she asked in exasperation.

"Just admit it. He's why you went back. You've loved him forever. Did you ever love me, Allison?"

"Of course I did, but…"

"Not like you love House. Yeah, I get it. What the hell is it about him? He's a jerk and he doesn't care about you. He's been chasing Cuddy since she's been trying to get knocked up…"

"Remember when Vogler was here? You talk about _me_ kissing House's ass? Please."

Chase sighed. "Did you call me just to argue?"

"No, I called to ask you to stop sending the flowers. We're not getting back together, no matter how much you might hope so. Good-bye, Chase." She ended the call and slammed her phone down on the desk, rubbing her temples.

"Nice flowers," House said as he stood behind her. "Chase must really miss you."

"Who says they're from Chase?" she said as she took the bouquet and handed it off to a nurse who would place them in a patient's room. He cocked his head to one side. "Well if they were from anyone else you would keep them. Besides, it's Tuesday and he likes you." He opened his eyes wide and gave her an exaggerated love sick look.

She laughed and shook her head. "Your perception is too much."

"How long do you think it'll be before he takes Cuddy up on her offer to come back here?"

"He won't come back. He likes the Mayo Clinic too much to leave. They gave him everything he wanted."

House came around the nurse's desk and sat down in the other chair. He carefully put his feet up on the desk and folded his hands over his stomach. Cameron sighed and leaned back in her chair. She knew when he sat down that way she was in for a long, aggravating conversation with him. No matter what she said or did, he would have his say even if he had to shout across the ER.

"And did Cuddy give you everything you wanted?" he asked with a salacious leer. "You can tell me. I know how to keep a secret. What did she offer you?"

Cameron laughed. "You'd like it if I was having some down and dirty affair with her, wouldn't you?"

"I told you before and I'll tell you again. You aren't gay, you're adventurous," he grinned. "Now, how adventurous were you and Cuddy?"

Cameron rolled her chair close to his and leaned forward until her lips brushed against his ear. He shivered slightly at the touch and she suppressed a smile of triumph.

"Well," she breathed against his skin. "We met in her office…"

House swallowed and his mouth opened slightly. She knew she had him and it sent a slight tremor through her.

"And discussed ways to make the ER run more efficiently. One day, she was wearing…"

Cuddy approached the desk and they jerked apart. She looked at them and then leaned on the desk. The neckline of her sweater dipped down giving them a good view of her cleavage and pink lace bra. Cameron sighed and stood up, picking up her phone and sliding it into her pocket.

"I have the reports you need," she told Cuddy as she folded her arms. "I thought we were meeting in your office at two."

"We are," Cuddy replied. "I actually came to find House. He's ducking clinic duty. Again."

"Moooommmm," House whined as he stared down her sweater.

Cameron walked away. Cuddy was always hovering around House and it was getting old very quickly. Maybe Chase was right. She just needed a second opinion. She knew just the person to ask.

Once she could take a break, she headed up to Wilson's office. Thankfully, he was sitting at his desk eating his lunch while he wrote something in a file. She knocked on the open door and he smiled when he looked up and saw her.

"Hi, got a minute?" she asked.

"Sure, come on in."

When she closed the door, he grinned. "What's up?"

Cameron decided to cut right to the chase. "Are House and Cuddy seeing each other?"

Wilson blinked and his jaw dropped open in surprise. "Well, that's random."

"Not really. I know they have a history, but lately I've noticed things and House will never say, so I thought I'd skip asking him and ask you, since you know him better than anyone. We can talk in confidence, right? Because if you're going to go tell House I was here, I'll just leave now," she said and started to rise.

Wilson held his hand up and stopped her. "Wait, sit down. I'm not going to tell House anything. And as far as I know, he and Cuddy aren't seeing each other. I realize they've amped up the banter and verbal foreplay lately, but that's as far as it goes. Cuddy has been trying to conceive for awhile now, and House was helping her, but not in the way you think. There's nothing between them. I think she hired you back because you're one of the few people who can keep him in line."

"But I'm not on his team anymore so I don't see how that really matters. And why didn't you tell House when I came back?"

Wilson sighed. "Cuddy asked me not to. He needed a team and Cuddy felt your return would be too big a distraction for him at the time."

"And she didn't want him to hire me, right?" she sighed.

"I don't know about that. I do know that she needed someone competent to run the ER and you were the only one she wanted. So when you accepted her offer, she was thrilled. She would've given you anything you wanted."

"Except a spot on House's team."

"Well, that's up to House. Why are you asking me all this? Are you...looking to get back on House's team?" he asked looking directly into her eyes.

Cameron looked away and shook her head. She wasn't going to give him any more information. "No, I love the ER. Having House's fellowship on my resume has been great but I've been there done that. He taught me a lot and I'll be forever grateful, but I'm done working for him. I've moved on."

"And Chase is…"

"Not coming back. We're done."

"Sorry to hear that."

Cameron shrugged. "I left to get House out of my system but I missed everyone else, too. I heard Foreman might be coming back."

"Yeah that's what I heard too."

"Well, thanks for your time."

She left his office, unaware that House watched her through the window of the Diagnostics conference room window.

* * *

 _Song lyrics: Jar of Hearts - Christina Perri_


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

 _Too afraid to go inside_

 _For the pain of one more loveless night_

 _Cause the loneliness will stay with me_

 _And hold me till I fall asleep_

House finally chose two doctors to work with him; Doctor Lawrence Kutner, and Doctor Amber Volakis. Cuddy forced him to take Foreman back but he made life a living hell for Foreman. Foreman spent much of his time down in the ER with Cameron. She also became friends with the other two members of House's team. Cameron and Amber became especially close, despite House referring to her as "Cut Throat Bitch." When Cameron came up to the Diagnostics office to invite Amber to lunch, House would either mock her or ignore her. The fact she went to see Wilson still gnawed at him. Wilson wouldn't say why she was in his office no matter how often House badgered him. Seeing Cameron around all the time was starting to get to House. He often left work and went straight to a bar where he got completely wasted. He usually staggered onto a bus or into a cab but sometimes he would ride his bike home. When Wilson let it slip that he was dating Amber, it was the final straw for House.

One warm evening in July, Cameron and Amber sat on the couch in Amber's apartment unpacking boxes. Wilson was moving in but had to work so Cameron volunteered to help her friends. Some boxes were in the bedroom and Wilson would unpack those later but the two women were unpacking his books while listening to music and talking.

"So," Cameron said as she put some of Wilson's books on a bookshelf. "Are things any better with House?"

Amber groaned. "He still calls me Cutthroat Bitch or CB. He has me doing scut work since he found out about me and Wilson. How did you stand working for him? He's either mocking us or terrorizing us."

Cameron turned back to get more books.

"It wasn't that bad," she replied. "Yes, he can be a real pain in the ass but I learned so much working for him that it was worth it."

"Well, you're in love with him so of course you'd say that," Amber teased.

"I'm not-" Cameron began when someone banged on the door. She recognized that hollow thump of cane against wood.

Amber got up and opened the door. House swayed and held his cane up mid-thump.

"Where is he?" he slurred as he lurched into the living room. "Where is your little Wilsy-poo? WILSON!"

"House!" Cameron admonished as she moved forward and took his arm.

"I know he's here. WILSON!"

Amber shut the door. "I'll get some water." She went into the kitchen and returned with a bottle of water. House swatted her hand away when she tried to give it to him. Cameron took it and pushed House down onto the couch. He fell back and pulled her on top of him. Time seemed to stand still as they stared at each other. House lifted his hand and curled it around the back of her head pulling her close. When his lips touched hers, her eyes fluttered closed. His mouth pressed against hers, hard and insistent. His tongue slipped past her lips and she moaned softly. Desire burned through her as her nipples hardened and a molten heat settled between her legs. She touched her tongue to his and could taste the bourbon. He sucked on her bottom lip as she pushed away from him. His head fell back on the couch and his eyes slid closed. Within seconds he was snoring. Cameron shifted him so he was lying on the couch. Amber covered him with a blanket.

"He didn't mean it," Cameron told her refusing to meet her friend's eyes.

"I'm not saying a word," Amber responded. "I don't want to get fired."

"Can he stay here tonight?" Cameron asked as she looked down at him.

"Sure. But you have to stay and keep an eye on him."

Cameron nodded. "I'll go get a trash can. I don't want to spend the night cleaning up his puke."

* * *

House awoke the next morning with a blinding headache and a dry mouth. He also had to pee. Carefully, he sat up. Looking around, he saw Cameron curled in a chair asleep. Pushing the blanket aside, he found his cane and poked her with the tip of it. She grimaced as she woke. Groaning softly, she stood and stretched. Her black t-shirt pulled across her breasts and rode up to show an expanse of toned, tanned skin. House felt a slight stirring of desire. Her hair was tousled and her eyes drowsy.

"Gotta pee," he rasped as he carefully stood up. "Where's the john?"

"Down the hall on the right," she told him in a sleep roughened voice. "I'll drive you home."

When he returned from the bathroom, Cameron had her purse and was waiting for him.

"Where's Wilson and CB?" he asked. "Making spawns in the bedroom?"

"They left for work already," she told him. "Where did you leave your car?"

He leaned heavily on his cane as he followed her out and waited for her to lock up.

"My bike," he said. "Somewhere downtown."

"You can send Kutner to look for it later."

They stepped out onto the sidewalk and House closed his eyes against the bright glare of the afternoon sun. He felt Cameron's hand on his arm and let her guide him to her car. Once in, he fell asleep again.

Cameron's face filled his field of vision when he opened his eyes again. He saw a light sprinkling of freckles across her nose and cheeks. Looking into her eyes, he noticed they were blue and green with flecks of gold around the iris. Her lashes were dark and looked silky. Her soft, pink lips stirred a desire to kiss her. Instead, he pushed past her and got out of her car. He swayed and she steadied him.

"Where's my cane?" he asked.

She bent down and he turned his eyes away from the firm curve of her ass defined by her snug jeans. Straightening, she handed it to him. Without another word, he took it and limped into his apartment.

"You're welcome," she sighed and got into her car.

House watched her leave from his living room window.

* * *

Wilson walked into House's office the next day.

"I heard you were looking for me," he said as he sat down in front of the desk. "What was so important?"

"Just when were you planning to tell me you've crossed over to the dark side?" House asked as he looked up from the journal he was reading. "I can almost understand dating CB but moving in with her? If I'd known you like being tortured-"

"Why were you looking for me?" Wilson interrupted.

House looked back down at his desk and the journal. "Don't remember," he muttered.

"Amber said you were drunk."

House flipped a page.

"You've been getting drunk a lot lately. Why?" Wilson asked concern evident in his voice.

"Last time I checked you were not my mother."

Wilson stood up. "I know this has something to do with either Cameron or Cuddy or both. You know where to find me when you're ready to talk about it."

"Yeah," House called to his back as he walked out. "Tied up in CB's Torture Chamber O'Love!"

He rubbed his right thigh and grabbed his bottle of Vicodin. He swallowed two and got up to take out his anger on his team.

That evening, House made his way out to his bike. Kutner found it and had it towed to the hospital for him earlier that day.

"House!" Cuddy called out.

He ignored her and stowed his backpack. He was placing his cane in its holder when she stopped next to him.

"You're over a year behind on your paperwork, charts and billing notices." she told him.

Carefully, he swung his leg over the bike. "That's what I have lackeys for. Go talk to one of them."

She grabbed his arm. "It's not their job. It's yours. I'm placing you on professional leave until you finish it all."

"So. I'll be on professional leave for eternity?"

Cuddy tightened her grip and leaned in close to him. He could detect the light scent of her perfume and something else; something muskier and earthy. Her scent was much different from Cameron who smelled clean and fresh.

"You will get that paperwork done or I'll suspend you," she said between clenched teeth. "I need you to do your job and that includes completing all the paperwork."

"So you've said," he remarked as he started his bike. He picked up his helmet. "I guess I'm suspended." After pulling his helmet on, he revved the engine. Cuddy released him and stood back. Once he was certain she was out of his path, he raced out of the parking lot.

* * *

 _ **Lyrics at the beginning of the chapter :The Lonely - Christina Perri**_


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

 _Showed up, like a good girl_

 _I fell for your fable_

 _But I'm no Cinderella_

 _I don't care, I'd let you take it_

A week went by and House didn't show up for work or answer his phone. Cuddy went to his apartment and banged on the door to no avail. At the end of the second week, she called Cameron into her office.

"I need a favor," she said as Cameron stood in front of her desk. "House is over a year behind on his paperwork. We've got an audit coming up next month. I need you to get him caught up. I'm willing to pay you triple your salary to do it."

"What about the ER?"

"The last time I checked the ER, you had the best-kept charts in the building. The last time I checked the fourth floor janitor's closet, I found House's charts. He hasn't filed anything since you left. Now, House may not care whether this hospital's accreditation gets downgraded, but the people who sign my paychecks do.," Cuddy told her. She leaned forward. "Please. We have to pass this audit."

Cameron sighed and nodded.

"Will you go to his apartment and tell him?" Cuddy asked. "He's ignoring me."

"Fine."

That night, Cameron stood outside House's apartment door balancing two pizza boxes and a six pack of beer. She kicked the door three times.

"It's me," she called out. "I have pizza and beer."

The door opened a crack and she could see one bright blue eye. "Cuddy out there?" he asked.

She laughed slightly. "No but the pizza is getting cold and the beer is getting warm."

The door swung open and he leaned out, looking up and down the hallway. Finally, he stepped back to allow her in. Blues music played softly and the scent of a cigar hung in the air. She carried everything into the kitchen with House on her heels. She put it all down on the butcher block island and he flipped open the top pizza box. Pulling out a slice, he devoured it before belching and grabbing another.

"Bring the beer and the pizza," he told her as he limped back into the living room.

She did as he asked and stood looking down at him.

"I know the paperwork annoys you, but patient records are important," she told him. "You can't let them sit there."

He smiled slyly. "You miss me," he commented as he opened a bottle of beer. "Say the word and I'll fire CB."

"Cuddy is paying me a shitload of money to get you caught up before the audit," she informed him. She started to walk to the door. "I'll be in your office at eight in the morning." She stopped with her hand on the doorknob. "I don't miss you," she said and then she was gone.

House leaned back and sipped his beer. The pizza sat like a stone in his stomach. Why did he care so much about her opinion? Why was it always so important to him? Why did she, over everyone else, manage to get to him the way she did? She said she didn't miss him but she would be in his office until all the paperwork was completed. Cuddy was paying her to do it so she didn't volunteer so she could spend more time with him. He drained his beer and reached for another. When all the beer was gone, he drank half a bottle of scotch before passing out on the couch.

The next day, he slowly made his way up to his office. Slinging his backpack behind his desk, he closed all the blinds before collapsing in his Eames lounger. He was on the verge of sleep when someone touched his arm. He lifted his sunglasses and squinted at Cameron. She wore a dark purple vest, as scoop neck lavender top with puffy sleeves and snug jeans, her hair was pulled back in a neat ponytail. She held a stack of charts in her hands.

"You need to sign these," she told him as she put them in his lap.

He shoved them onto the floor and pulled his sunglasses back down. A moment later the files landed in his lap again. He groaned and tried to sit up.

"Put them on my desk so I can sign the damn things," he told her.

Her hand brushed against the crotch of his jeans as she picked up the files. Tossing his sunglasses to one side, he waited for his slight erection to go down. Then he got up and sat at his desk. She pulled a file from the top of the stack, opened it, and handed him a pen. He scrawled his signature and glanced down her top as she opened another one. She had a mole on the inner swell of her right breast and he found it hard to look away from it. Forcing himself to focus on the paperwork, they slowly made their way through the pile.

"That it?" he asked as he leaned back.

She looked at him with her head tilted and a bored expression. He knew that look.

"That's the first half of the first box. There are fifteen more boxes. Get comfortable."

She turned and walked back into the conference room. House put his head on his desk and groaned.

Two weeks later, he sat in front of the white board. Three days earlier he appropriated his favorite soap star. Currently, the man was down the hall in a coma. House was missing something but he wasn't sure what it was.

He turned his head when a loud thud came from his office. Shrugging, he turned back to the whiteboard with its long lists of symptoms. Cameron must have dropped a box. A moment later, a letter filled his field of vision. He swatted it away but Cameron thrust it back in front of him. Her hand shook and when he looked up at her, rage contorted her normally beautiful face. He sighed and leaned back.

"You wrote a letter of recommendation for Robert?" she asked between clenched teeth.

He briefly toyed with the idea of asking her who Robert was but thought better of it. She was angry enough.

"Yep."

She looked at the letter. "Doctor Chase was an exemplary member of my team," she read her voice shaking and her face getting redder. "He excels at leadership and out of the box thinking. His diagnostic skills are above average. Any hospital would benefit having him on staff."

Looking up, he saw her eyes were dilated and her breath came in short gasps.

"Breathe," he told her softly.

She pulled another sheet of paper from the front pocket of her jeans. Tears gathered in her eyes and she brushed them away.

"Doctor Cameron possesses average diagnostic skills. She lacks any discernible leadership qualities. She becomes too emotionally attached to her patients and coworkers," she read. "She is better suited to research or teaching."

House folded his arms and looked at her. "You told me you liked me, coerced a date out of me and then slept with Chase. There are too many examples of your attachment to our patients for me to point out."

"You FIRED Chase!" she cried disregarding what he said. "Yet you wrote him a glowing recommendation." She shook the letter he wrote about her. "This is why I had such a hard time getting a job."

"That and I reiterated it all when they called," he told her. "About both of you."

Her brows drew together and her lips parted. She stared at him. Slowly she dropped the letters and they fluttered to the floor.

"Why?" she whispered.

He shrugged. "I wanted to make sure Chase stayed away and that you would have to come back."

She closed her eyes and took several deep breaths. "You had the chance to keep me here. When I left, all you had to do was ask me to stay. You didn't."

Slowly, she left and House went back to staring at the whiteboard.

"Evan Greer's allergic to the quinine in the tonic water he drinks onscreen," Cameron said from the doorway. "Pump him full of steroids and he should be fine."

House looked over his shoulder at her. She stared stonily at him.

"But then, my diagnostic skills are just average. What would I know?" she said with a shrug before turning and walking toward the elevators.

* * *

 _ **Song Lyrics: I Don't Wanna Break - Christina Perri**_


	5. Chapter 5

**_A/N: Thanks for the awesome comments to this story so far. Here's another chapter for you :) Lyrics are from Let Me Fall by Christina Perri_**

 **Chapter Five**

 _Everybody wants to know_

 _If I'm okay I'm here_

 _Cause they don't know_

 _The things you spoke my love_

Cameron started an outreach program where doctors and nurses from the ER went out into the community to treat shut ins and homeless people. A month passed since she confronted House with the letters. They both acted as if nothing happened but there was an underlying tension between them. It gnawed at House and he took every opportunity to harass her.

"You're an idiot," House told her one day when he was down in the ER looking for a case. "You think working with agoraphobics and the morbidly obese will somehow be better than running yourself ragged in the ER? Or is this all part of your obsessive need to make everything and everyone perfect?"

"I'm still running the ER. It's something different. And I don't have an obsessive need to make everyone perfect."

"It's just much more depressing. You always did love self-flagellating. Will it be permanent?" he asked referring to the outreach program.

"I don't know. Maybe." She glanced at her watch. "I have to go." She started to walk away.

"Cameron," he called out to her.

She turned around, put her hands on her hips and glared at him. "What, House?"

He limped over to her until they stood practically toe to toe. "One could also argue you're taking this on so you can avoid me." Then he looked like he had a revelation. "Wait, you don't still have the hots for me, do you?"

Cameron opened her mouth to say something, anything, but nothing came out.

"Don't worry. Your secret's safe with me." With a wink, he turned and limped away.

"What was that about?" Cuddy asked as she joined Cameron.

"Nothing. Just House being House."

"Do you have some time to talk?" Cuddy asked.

Actually she didn't but she wasn't going to tell her boss that. "Sure," she said.

"Come with me," Cuddy said.

They walked upstairs to her office. Cuddy closed the doors and the blinds. Then she and Cameron sat down on the couch.

"I've adopted a baby," Cuddy told her. "I get her next week."

"Congratulations, Lisa!" Cameron told her with genuine warmth.

"Thank you," Cuddy smiled. "I'm going on maternity leave and the board has approved you to take over for me. I'll be out for a year. I have the time and I want to be home with her as long as possible."

Cameron sat and stared at Cuddy. A year. A year of being responsible for the entire hospital. A year of being responsible for House. Something fluttered in her stomach at the thought of seeing House on a regular basis.

"You can have some time to think about it but their other choice is Foreman," Cuddy told her.

Cameron started to laugh.

"Yeah," Cuddy laughed.

"Who will run the ER and the outreach program?"

"I was going to ask Doctor Swan. She's practically your clone."

Cameron nodded. Swan was a perfect choice. "I'll do it."

"You'll have to manage House," Cuddy warned her.

Cameron smiled. "Not a problem."

Cuddy leaned forward and hugged her. "Thank you. I knew I made the right choice in suggesting you to the board. You'll be great."

"I hope so."

"I have faith in you, or I wouldn't have recommended you for this. You can deal with House better than anyone. He'll listen to you."

"And when he doesn't?"

"He will."

Cameron sighed and shrugged her shoulders as she left Cuddy's office. "Here goes nothing."

The next day Cameron started her new job. Swan sent her an interesting case and Cameron went to find House. After looking for half an hour, she glanced at her watch, saw it was lunch time, and went to the cafeteria where she saw House grabbing a bagel.

She approached and blocked his exit. "You gonna pay for that?"

"Nice of you to offer. Now I can actually get some cream cheese."

Cameron shook her head and held up the blue file folder. "Twenty-nine year-old teacher. She works with special needs children. She —"

"Love what you're wearing. Brings out the blue of the case file, which means it's not from the ER. So why are you here?" he asked before tearing open the cream cheese packet with his teeth.

"Because Dr. Cuddy is not here. She's decided to go on maternity leave so she can be with the baby for a while. I'm taking over her day-to-day responsibilities, like babysitting you.

House cocked his head to one side. "Interesting. You have your whole life ahead of you. So why would Cuddy want you to die so young?"

"She figured I'd spent three years working for you so I was inoculated."

House grinned. "Good. Fun! You get to exercise your newfound power. I squirm under your thumb, resent the student becoming the teacher, and then push comes to shove, and we all get to realize what our real roles should be. Then you put out." He took a large bite of the bagel and continued to stare at her.

Cameron merely smiled and handed him the file. "That's why I took the job."

House was stunned and watched her walk away, admiring the swing in her hips and her legs in those heels.

House wasn't sure if she meant it or not, but he decided to test her and find out. She'd either take him up on it, or be completely disgusted and toss him out of her office. Both ideas amused him greatly, and it was a win-win as far as he was concerned. She had to know he'd test her limits, didn't she? Otherwise she was more naive than he thought and he knew she was smarter than that. With that in mind for later, he returned to his office to meet with his team regarding their new patient.

Later that day, he barged into her office while she was on the phone. "I'm going to have to call you back," she said to the person on the other end and hung up. "What?"

He walked up to her desk and stared at her. "I need oral sex. I'm pretty sure biological imperative qualifies as medical sense."

Her look of disbelief amused him and he grinned at her.

"Can I return my phone call now?" she asked quietly.

"I don't really see how that's gonna be possible," House said out of the corner of his mouth and watched her pick up the receiver and open the folder in front of her, completely ignoring him. Realizing that she'd won that round, he turned and left, puzzled by her response.

* * *

 _Scenes from this chapter were borrowed from 5X13 Big Baby_


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N: We're glad you're all enjoying this :) Opening lyrics are from a song called Butterfly by Christina Perri. Hughville is a master at picking the right songs for each chapter, isn't she? :D**_

 **Chapter Six**

 _I know exactly what you do_

 _I made damn sure I studied you_

 _You won't pick me_

 _I am just a breeze underneath your wings_

 _So I pray each night you'll change your mind_

 _And maybe I am worth the fight_

 _But I am wrong every time_

 _You only know how to fly_

One bright chilly day in October, Kutner walked into the Diagnostics conference room. He stopped short when he saw a young woman sitting at the desk in the corner. She had a stack of patient files in front of her. Her long dark hair was smoothed back from her face with a headband, she wore a vest over a puffy sleeved floral top and she looked up at him with a smile. She had large brown eyes and two tiny dimples next to her full lips.

"I'm Sarah Edwards, Doctor House's assistant," she said. "Are you Doctor Kutner?"

Kutner smiled and nodded. He hung up his coat and walked over to her.

"You can call me Larry," he said.

"I made coffee and there are bagels with cream cheese, Larry."

"Did House hire you?" he asked as he leaned against the side of the desk.

"No, Doctor Cameron did."

Kutner bit back a laugh. "Well, welcome to Diagnostics," he told her. "I'll let you get back to work."

Amber arrived a few minutes later. She stared at Sarah and then looked at Kutner.

"Sarah," Kutner said with a shit eating grin. "This is Doctor Volakis." He turned to Amber. "Doctor Cameron hired her to be House's assistant."

Amber's eyes widened and then she smiled widely. "Hey, Sarah. Did you make coffee?"

"And she brought bagels," Kutner told her.

When Foreman arrived, he nodded at Sarah. "Good morning, Miss Edwards."

"Good morning, Doctor Foreman."

"Did you make copies of the new patient's chart?" he asked her.

She stood and picked up a small pile of files which she brought to the table. As she was passing out the files, House entered. He threw his backpack into his office and stumbled slightly when he saw Sarah. She had her back to him and he stared at her.

"What year is it?" he asked looking slightly shocked. "Is it 2004?"

Sarah turned and smiled at him.

Foreman leaned back in his chair and his eyes gleamed with amusement. "House, meet your new assistant, Sarah Edwards."

"Good morning, Doctor House," Sarah said smiling brightly. She held a file out to him.

He snatched it from her and eyed her suspiciously. "I don't need an assistant. I already have my own group of bitches to do my bidding."

Sarah swallowed nervously and edged past him to sit at her desk.

House looked at Foreman. "You hire that?"

"Cameron did. Though I did help vet her. I think she'll fit in here very well." A slight smile curved one corner of Foreman's mouth. Part of him felt sorry for Edwards and another part of him looked forward to the rest of the day.

For the most part, House ignored Sarah until she asked him to sign the patient files she worked on all day. He didn't react when she put the pile on his desk and cleared her throat. House clicked to the next video. Suggestive music played and he bobbed his head in time to the beat. A slight gasp escaped her when she caught sight of his computer monitor. Two women were having sex with a horse. He looked over his shoulder at her.

"You like horses, Edwards?" he asked with an innocent look.

She shook her head and practically ran from the room. He waited a few minutes and then turned to sign the files. When he was done, he opened his desk drawer and took out a length of pale pink ribbon. Tying it around the files, he set them back on his desk, called the hospital mailroom and asked them to be delivered to Doctor Cameron.

As he was packing up to leave later that evening, Cameron walked into his office. She wore a dark green dress with a scoop neck that showed off the upper curves of her breasts and a full skirt that swirled around her toned legs.

"Porn?" she asked. "Really? You couldn't do any better than that? I'm disappointed." She turned to leave but stopped with her hand on the door frame. "Your new assistant starts in the morning. Try to be a little more creative."

House watched her until she disappeared from sight. Then he laughed. The game was on.

Cameron walked into the lobby and saw several balloons attached to a stack of patient files. She picked them up and smiled. Yesterday, House sent his fourth assistant home crying after he placed several white mice from the genetics lab in her desk drawer. Cameron knew the woman was terrified of mice and sent House an anonymous text letting him know. She also made sure the woman got a large bonus and placement at a local doctor's office for it.

House sat in his Eames lounger when he heard the familiar click of heels out in the hall. He looked around for a way to escape but it was too late. Cuddy entered his office with her baby in a car seat carrier.

"Oh, how convenient. I was just talking about you," House commented.

"Really…"

"Well, not you specifically. I was just lecturing my team about whores and hypocrisy."

She frowned. "I was just about to ask if you were free on Friday night."

"Nope. I'm taking a lovely lady to the Philharmonic."

Cuddy looked at him, doubtfully. "Is that your polite way of saying you're going to be with a hooker?"

"Two. Can't create a harmonic with just one." He motioned to the baby. "And how is your boozy crack baby?"

Cuddy narrowed her eyes and put the carrier down on the floor. She sat on the footstool and lifted the baby out. "Rachel's fine. Want to hold her?"

Without waiting for a response, she handed Rachel over to House and he held her up for inspection.

Cameron approached House's office but stopped just short of the open door. Cuddy was there with her baby. Cameron started to turn away but stopped when she heard Cuddy speak.

"I was going to invite you to Rachel's Simchat Bat but I don't want you there. It's a special occasion filled with love and acceptance, and the last thing I need is someone there who's filled with loathing and contempt."

House nodded as he continued to study Rachel.

Cuddy blinked in surprise. "That's it? You're really not coming?"

"Yes. I'm really not coming."

"Thank you."

Rachel gurgled and then suddenly spat up, causing Cuddy to laugh. Cameron heard enough and she turned and went back to her office.

After Cuddy visited House, she went down to see Cameron next.

"I don't know how you managed House for so long," Cameron said as she typed something on the computer. "I'd be bald from pulling my hair out."

"Is he giving you problems?" Cuddy asked as she put Rachel's car seat carrier on the couch. Rachel cooed as Cuddy sat down next to her. "Come meet Rachel."

Cameron got up and took Rachel from Cuddy when she held the baby out. Cradling her, Cameron looked down at her. Rachel wore a pink fleece footed onesie and a pink hat. She had large blue eyes and tufts of soft dark hair.

"She's adorable," Cameron said.

"So what's going on with House?" Cuddy asked.

Cameron sat down on the couch and continued to hold Rachel. "Oh, the usual. He's gone through four assistants already." She didn't mention the game playing aspect of it. The last thing she needed was a lecture from Cuddy about professionalism.

"You let him have an assistant?"

Cameron handed Rachel back to her. "Every department head has one. He's caught up on all his paperwork and billing. The second one actually lasted a week."

"House can't have an assistant," Cuddy told her as she put Rachel back in her carrier and buckled her in.

"Why? Because I did all his paperwork for him?"

"No one made you."

Cameron counted to ten. "Well, I will continue to hire assistants for him until I find one who can deal with him."

Cuddy barked out a laugh. "Good luck with that."

Cameron stood. "Well, it was good to see you and Rachel is adorable."

Cuddy stood, too. "I'd like to invite you to Rachel's Simchat Bat on Friday night at seven. It's a Jewish baby naming ceremony."

"I'll have to check my calendar and get back with you," Cameron told her. "That okay?"

Cuddy picked up the carrier and looked down at her daughter. "Fine." She walked to the door and then turned back. "A word of advice? Stop hiring assistants for House. Let the board know he's not doing his job. It'll do him good to deal with the consequences of his actions."

Cameron merely smiled as Cuddy left. Slowly, she sat down at her desk. She waited for the rage that surged through her to cool. Then she picked up the phone and arranged for House's fifth assistant to start the next day.

The next morning, House walked in and saw an older man sitting at the desk in the conference room. He looked over at Foreman who shrugged. The man stood and held out his hand.

"Henry Dobson," he said as he waited for House to shake his hand. When House continued to stare at him, he lowered his hand. "I'm your assistant."

House turned and entered his office. Dobson sat down and went back to work. A few minutes later, Cameron walked past the conference room and into House's office.

"Problem?" she asked as she sat down in a chair in front of his desk.

House leaned back in his chair, folded his hands over his stomach and shook his head in mock disappointment.

"We were having fun and you changed the game," he told her.

"Dobson worked in the admissions office at Columbia for thirty years. He also audited all their medical classes. You need an actual assistant who can actually help you."

"I actually need some actual sex. You up for that?"

"Yes, actually, I am," she countered with a smile.

His eyes widened and then he grinned. "Oh, you're good." He sat forward and put his hands on the desk. "We okay now? About the whole letter thing?"

Cameron looked at him until he squirmed slightly. "Yes," she said softly and got up.

House watched her go and sighed.


	7. Chapter 7

**_A/N: Short chapter today. But still, enjoy!_**

 ** _Lyrics for this chapter are Stay by Rhianna_**

 **Chapter Seven**

 _Funny you're the broken one but I'm the only one who needed saving_

 _'Cause when you never see the light it's hard to know which one of us is caving_

Cameron's assistant buzzed her to let her know Foreman was waiting to see her.

"He's drinking again," Foreman informed her as he sat down on the couch. "But, I guess you know that since he calls you to pick him up."

Cameron walked over to the couch and sat down.

"Yeah, he's gotten worse since Cuddy came in with the baby," she sighed.

"Why do you enable him?"

"What am I supposed to do? Let him get killed or kill someone?" she asked in exasperation.

"He calls Wilson, too," Foreman remarked. "And Wilson blows him off." He stood up and straightened his suit jacket. "You should do the same. He'll just keep using you. He's messed up, Cameron. He'll screw you over. And not in the good way."

He walked out and Cameron leaned back on the couch. Foreman was right. Something in House was broken and that broken part spoke to something broken in her. She rose, got her purse, and left.

When she arrived at House's apartment, she reached up and pulled down the key he kept behind the molding over the door. Unlocking the door, she shook her head at the clutter and the stale smell. She shut the door, hung her purse on the doorknob and went to work.

She was drying dishes in the kitchen when he came shuffling in holding his right leg.

"I see the cleaning fairy is here," he said in a sleep roughened voice. He leaned against the counter as he made coffee. "Why are you here?"

"You need help with your drinking," she said as she carefully folded the dish towel and then gripped it.

"So we're just skipping over my Vicodin addiction?" he asked as he turned to look at her. "Interesting. Still trying to fix me. Glad to know nothing has changed in the grand scheme of things."

The scent of coffee filled the kitchen. House folded his arms and looked at her. For the first time, she saw contempt and derision in his clear blue eyes. She threw the towel on the counter.

"I never tried to fix you," she told him in an even controlled voice. "I just wanted you to be happy. Everyone tells me that you're miserable but I think you like wallowing in your misery and pain. " She paused and House stared at her. "Be at work on time. Do your damn clinic hours. Attend department head meetings. Consider this your last warning. Screw up one more time and I _will_ fire you."

She walked toward the front door.

"You won't fire me," he told her from the kitchen doorway. "You aren't strong enough. What I wrote in that letter is true. You lack leadership skills-"

She turned and was on him before he could finish. Her hands gripped his t-shirt and she stared at him with real hatred.

"You bastard! I've been running the hospital for six months now. I ran that ER like clockwork. You couldn't run your damn department without me!" she growled. "I am not the scared, naive little girl you hired to be your damn lobby art. I'm a hospital administrator. The board asked me to stay on. Cuddy isn't coming back. Did she tell you that? Did she tell you that she met someone else? I heard what she said to you. She's right. You're filled with nothing but loathing and contempt-"

House pulled her in closer and kissed her. The kiss was hard and meant to hurt her. For a moment she tried to pull away then returned the kiss with passion before pushing him away. They both stood staring at each other. Their harsh breathing was the only sound in the apartment.

"Get dressed and get to work," she said once she had a modicum of control. "And next time you get drunk take the damn bus home."

She stalked out his apartment slamming the door behind her. House touched his lips and watched the door for a very long time. She didn't come back.

* * *

House came to work, did his clinic hours, sat silently in the department head meetings and avoided Cameron. Cameron made sure the hospital ran efficiently but there was a hardness about her. She heard whispered rumors of House's drinking but did nothing. Finally, Wilson went to see Cameron.

"What happened?" he asked as he stood in front of her desk with his hands on his hips.

Cameron leaned back in her chair. "So, it's Super Wilson to the rescue, is it? Your one goal in life is to save House. When are you two getting married?" She didn't bother to hide to snideness or contempt in her voice.

"What is going on with you?" he asked as he rubbed the back of his neck. "You care about House. You're in love with him."

"All he cares about is the puzzle and getting high."

Wilson sank down in one of the chairs facing her desk. "He never wanted you to leave. He'd never admit it but he was devastated when you started up with Chase and then left. Did you know he wouldn't tell me one thing about your date? He was actually nervous about taking you out. I knew he was serious when he showed me the flowers he bought you. He didn't buy Stacy flowers. He never bought any woman flowers, not even his own mother. You meant something to him."

"Did I? Or was I just lobby art; a puzzle to solve? All he had to do was say something. Anything. But he didn't because he doesn't care about anyone but himself." She looked away. "I was in love with him. I was an idiot. I tried to understand him, tried to be like him because I thought I could heal him. I thought I could make him happy. I was an idiot for thinking that."

"He wants you but he's too screwed up to tell you," Wilson said as he got up. "For the sake of both of you, I hope you can work this out. Otherwise…" He shook his head. "He's going to kill himself or someone else if he continues on the way he's going."

He left and Cameron leaned her elbows on her desk. She rested her head in her hands. She still loved House. She always would but she couldn't save him. He had to want to be saved and he didn't.

Amber swept in and sat on the corner of Cameron's desk. Cameron composed herself quickly and looked up at her friend.

"Wilson is on tonight all night," Amber told her. "Come over and we'll drink wine and watch sappy movies."

Cameron forced a smile and nodded. "Sounds like fun."

Amber got up and started toward the door. She stopped and walked back.

"Would you write me a script for Amantadine? I'm getting that horrible flu that's going around," she said.

Cameron nodded and pulled out her prescription pad. She filled one out, tore it off and handed it to Amber.

"Nice tag teaming you two did," Cameron commented as Amber opened the door.

Amber laughed and walked out.


	8. Chapter 8

**_A/N: Only 2 more chapters after this one. But don't be sad. There's another story in the works as we speak :D Thank you for your awesome comments so far, especially the guest reviews that we can't respond to via PM. They're much appreciated :)_**

 ** _Song lyrics for this chapter: Halo by Beyonce_**

 **Chapter Eight**

 _Remember those walls I built_

 _Well, baby, they're tumbling down_

 _And they didn't even put up a fight_

 _They didn't even make a sound_

That night Cameron brought a bottle of wine to Amber and Wilson's apartment. Amber opened the door and sneezed.

"Meds not working?" Cameron asked as she handed over the bottle.

Amber took it and placed it on the coffee table. Then she grabbed a tissue and blew her nose.

"It is but I've still got some symptoms." She sat down on the couch and put her feet up. "I've got _A Walk To Remember_ all ready to go."

"I'll get the glasses and the corkscrew," Cameron said.

"I ordered Chinese," Amber called out.

"Perfect," Cameron told her as she returned with two wine glasses and sat down to open the wine.

Three hours later they were watching Dirty Dancing and eating when a cell phone began to ring.

Cameron got up and dug through her purse. "Not me."

Amber found hers. "Not me." She looked around and saw Wilson's sitting on the kitchen counter. She picked it up and answered it.

"Wilson isn't here, House," she said then listened. Sighing, she dropped her head. "Fine, I'll be there in about twenty minutes."

Once she hung up, she looked at Cameron. "He's drunk and needs a ride. I guess girl's night is officially over."

"I'll go." Cameron told her. "You're sick and Wilson will be home soon."

"I thought you told him you weren't going to pick him up any more?" Amber said as she looked for her purse.

Cameron sighed. "There's no reason for you to go get him. He's not your problem. I'll go. Where is he?"

"Sherry's Bar. You know where that is?"

Cameron nodded, grabbed her purse and hugged her friend. "I'll see you tomorrow."

* * *

Cameron walked into the smoky establishment and saw House up front arguing with the bartender. She shook her head and made her way over to him. The bartender looked at her as he held House's keys just out of reach.

"You know him?" he asked Cameron.

"Yes," she replied as she looked at House.

Turning his head, he squinted at her. "Hmm, I guess one blonde is as good as another."

She took the keys from the bartender, paid House's tab and then helped him stand. He leaned against her and she staggered a bit as his full weight landed on her. Putting his arm around her shoulders, she led him out. A bus was pulling up at the stop in front of the bar so House pulled away from Cameron and hauled himself up the steps, weaving down the aisle before falling into an empty seat. Cameron put his keys in her purse and got on the bus. When she sat in the empty seat across the aisle from him the bus began to move and she turned to look at House.

"Why are you so drunk?" she asked. "What's going on?"

House's head flopped around as he turned to look at her. "Everybody is happy, happy, happy. Why did you have to come back?" he asked as he squinted at her. "Everything was fine and then you showed up…" his voice trailed off and his eyes widened. It was the last thing Cameron saw.

The oncoming garbage truck's headlights were blinding as they approached the side of the bus where Cameron sat and the impact threw her out of her seat and into the aisle. People screamed as the bus turned on its side and skidded down the road. House reached for Cameron and saw her reaching for him as shards of glass and debris flew everywhere. Their hands almost connected but the bus finally screeched to a halt and everyone got thrown again.

House was in a daze when he climbed out of the bus and wandered down the street. He didn't remember how he got to the bar, just that he was there with a pretty girl attempting to give him a lap dance.

The next thing he knew, he was in the ER, sitting on a table getting stitched up by one of the doctors. Looking around, he saw people scrambling around to treat what appeared to be accident victims. He closed his eyes and tried to remember what happened.

He remembered climbing out of the bus and wandering into a strip club. Why was he on the bus? He winced when the doctor suturing his head hit a spot of his scalp that wasn't numbed up. He slowed his breathing and concentrated. Slowly, it all came back to him. Cameron arriving at the bar. Getting on the bus and her following him. Then the bright lights behind her as she looked at him. The glass imploding and throwing her toward him and then the bus rolling. He could see her hand reaching for his before the bus rolled again and she flew toward the front. He remembered the groans, screams and crying. He remembered slowly getting up and crawling toward Cameron. He remembered the post impaling her right leg. She didn't look scared or like she was in pain. No, she looked relieved when she saw him; relieved that he was alive.

The doctor finished with him and House pushed him away. He staggered through the ER shouting Cameron's name. Wilson emerged from a curtained off area in a corner in the back. House reached for him.

"Where is she?" he asked as Wilson gripped his arms.

"She's being taken care of," Wilson replied with a neutral expression. "Did you get a head CT?"

"Don't need one."

House lurched past him and ripped open the curtain. Cameron lay on a bed hooked up to tubes, IVs and machines. Her right leg was bandaged and propped up on a pillow. Her skin was pasty and her lips were white. She had numerous cuts and bruises.

Foreman appeared before him and put his hand on House's chest. "We removed the pole but there's extensive damage to her leg. We're getting her stabilized so she can go up for surgery." He looked away from House. "Her medical proxy has authorized us to amputate if necessary."

"What the fuck is Chase thinking?" he shouted as he pushed Foreman to one side. "Is he here or did he give permission over the phone to mutilate her?"

"I'm her medical proxy," Wilson said softly.

House turned to look at him in shock.

"You? She chose you?"

Wilson nodded. "She needed a new one and her parents are too far away. She asked me, House."

House turned his back on him and looked at Cameron. Without another word, he limped out of the ER.

House slumped on a bench in the hallway. The pain in his head was excruciating. Leaning back against the wall, he pressed his fists against his temples and tried not to scream.

"You need an MRI," Amber said as she sat down beside him. She leaned a metal cane against the bench. "Foreman is pushing to amputate Allison's leg but Wilson is fighting him. He won't do it unless it's the only way to save her."

House slowly put his fists on his thighs. "Why are you here?" he ground out.

"Allison is my friend. She was at the apartment when you called. It should have been me in there."

"And you'd be dead from Amantadine poisoning," House responded dully. "You need to get better at hiding your drug usage."

"Like you?"

Foreman stomped past them followed by Wilson. Wilson stopped and watched Foreman until he was gone. He turned to House and Amber.

"Cameron is stable enough for surgery," he told them.

House pushed himself up and swayed. "I want to observe. Make sure you don't let them hack her leg up."

"You could have a skull fracture," Wilson told him. "You need an MRI and then be admitted to the ICU."

"I needed _you_ to help me!" House shouted. "Where the hell were you?"

Wilson looked at Amber who got up and walked into the ER. Once they were alone, Wilson grabbed House's arms. House stared at him shaking with rage.

"You can observe the surgery from the observation deck only if you are sitting the whole time," Wilson told him. "And I was on call or I would have picked you up." He stared hard at House. "Once this is over, you're going to tell me what the hell is wrong with you." He released House. "Now, come on. She should be in OR 2 by now."

Wilson walked beside House to the observation lounge above OR 2. House leaned heavily on the cane and panted loudly. Once they made it up to the stairs, Wilson forced House into a chair he pulled up to the glass overlooking the operating room. Reaching out, House pushed the intercom button.

"Did you get someone from plastics to close?" he asked harshly.

Wilson pulled his hand away. "Yes," he said softly "Wilkins is doing the surgery but Akins from Plastics is there, too."

The door opened and Wilson looked over to see Amber enter followed by Kutner and Dobson. Silence descended as they all watched.

Four hours later, Wilkins informed them Cameron's leg would heal without any problems and she'd stopped all the internal bleeding.

House stood and started to make his way to the door when he collapsed.

* * *

 _The bus is empty. House sits in the back and stares at the empty seats. Suddenly music starts to play, the beat causing the seat beneath him to shake slightly. A pole appears in the middle of the aisle and Cuddy sidles up to it. Her hair falls around her in wild curls. Her blue eyes seem to glow as she smiles at him. She is wearing a business suit and six inch pumps. Slowly, she reaches up and grasps the pole. She undulates around it, shedding her suit as she does. Once she is down to a sheer black lace bra and matching thong, she reaches for him. As her fingers brush his cheek, she morphs into Cameron. The pole is gone and she smiles at him. She is enveloped in a white cape, the hood edged in fur and lace. Her hand is warm as she trails her fingers along his cheekbone._

 _"House?" she whispers. "Is that what you really want? Or do you want this?"_

 _She sheds the cape to reveal a long white wedding dress._

House gasped and opened his eyes. He was in the ICU. Turning his head carefully to the left, he saw Cameron in the bed next to him. He turned to the right and saw Wilson asleep in a chair. Next to him was another patient. He reached out and poked Wilson. With a sharp intake of air, Wilson awoke and rubbed his eyes. He looked at House and got up.

"You have a skull fracture," Wilson told him as he checked House's vitals. "Cameron is sleeping. She woke up earlier and asked about you. I told her you were fine."

"You lied."

Wilson looked down at him. "There was no reason to upset her. So, yeah, I lied. But you will be fine if you don't do anything stupid." He looked away for a moment and then back down at House. "Why have you been getting drunk so much lately?"

"I'm tired," House told him and closed his eyes. He heard Wilson sigh and sit back down. He shifted in the bed to get more comfortable. The dream bothered him. He didn't want to marry Cameron. He didn't want Cameron. Did he? Maybe that was his brain trying to tell him that Cuddy was a better choice for him. Cameron was purity and goodness. Cuddy was sex and naughtiness. Sleep consumed him before he could give it any more thought.

* * *

"What are you doing here?" House asked when he saw Cameron in the hospital cafeteria a couple months later. If he were honest, she looked pretty good for someone who'd been laid up for weeks.

"It's nice to be up and around. The leg is fine, by the way. Thanks for asking."

"My head is fine, thanks for asking," he said as he grabbed a sandwich catching her slight smile out of the corner of his eye. "So, you're back at work?"

"Yes. I'm not supposed to be on my feet too much yet but I couldn't stand staying home any longer. And I missed this place." _And you_ , she thought.

House cocked his head to one side and studied her for a minute, making her suddenly feel vulnerable under his scrutiny.

"You were right to make Wilson your medical proxy. I would've just pulled the plug." And on that note, he turned and walked away.

Cameron sighed. "No, you wouldn't have," she whispered and then headed for her office. As she settled at her desk to do some paperwork, her leg cramped up. She leaned back in her chair and stretched her leg out but the pain intensified. Gripping the arms of her chair, she tried to relax but the pain became unbearable. Fighting back tears, she picked up the phone and called the PT lab. Within minutes, a PT arrived and began working on Cameron's leg. House stood in the doorway and watched as Cameron's face contorted in pain. He knew all too well the pain she was experiencing. He dealt with it every single day. The only difference was he was the cause of her pain. He got drunk and led her onto that bus. She ended up with a pole through her leg because of him. Once again, he was the cause of her pain. He turned and limped away.


	9. Chapter 9

**_A/N: One more chapter after this! We thought you might enjoy some Smexy goodness today:)_ Lyrics are A Thousand Years by Christina Perri**

 **Chapter Nine**

 _And all along I believed I would find you_

 _Time has brought your heart to me_

 _I have loved you for a thousand years_

 _I'll love you for a thousand more_

* * *

Cameron arrived home to see House leaning against the door of her condo. He tapped his cane on the welcome mat and his head was bowed. They hadn't spoken much since the bus crash. In the months since then, she knew he stopped drinking and seemed to make an effort to be more responsible. She walked up to him and put her hand on his. He looked up at her.

"Come in," she said softly.

He nodded and stood to one side as she unlocked the door. Following her in, he closed the door and stood in the entry. Cameron put her things down and turned to look at him. His eyes glistened and he looked down again.

"I didn't want you to go," he whispered. "I wanted you to stay. You're right. That's what I should have told you when you left before." He cleared his throat. "I was afraid. I don't want to destroy you."

She took one step closer to him.

"I'm a miserable asshole. I don't want to be miserable any more. I want to…" he shook his head. "I want you."

She took another step closer to him.

"I never meant for you to get hurt," he continued. He rubbed his thumb over his forehead. "If you want me to leave, I will."

She took another step closer and put her hand against his chest. "I don't want you to go. I want you to stay."

He looked at her and she smiled.

"I love you," she told him.

"But you wish you didn't. Right?"

She put her arms around him and rested her cheek against his shoulder. "Wrong, House. I'm glad I do. I know you don't love me-"

"I do. Love you," he said quickly.

She slowly stepped back from him, her mouth slightly open and he chuckled. "Well don't look so shocked. I am capable of loving another human being."

"It's not that, it's just...I never expected you to come out and say it. Like that."

He shrugged. "I wasn't aware that there was any right or wrong way to say it."

"There isn't. Can I get you anything? I was going to open a bottle of wine. It's been a shit of a day."

"Yeah, wine sounds good."

"Have you eaten? I have some leftover pasta I can heat up. I made enough to last the week."

"Get me drunk, cook me dinner...what's next?"

Cameron grinned at him as she opened the bottle of wine. "Oh I'm sure we'll think of something."

House took the bottle from her and set it aside. "I can think of something right now," he said as he backed her into the corner of the kitchen.

She placed her hands on his chest to stop him. "House...I'm hungry."

"Mmm...me too," he whispered as he began kissing her neck, starting below her ear and working his way across her throat.

Cameron let out a long sigh of pleasure at the way his scruff tickled her skin. Thoughts of food were quickly forgotten as her hands slid up his chest and her fingers buried in his hair, pulling his head up for a kiss. She needed to feel his mouth on hers again. Part of it didn't seem real and it was the only way she could ensure that it was.

He kissed his way back up to her mouth and his lips fastened on hers in a searing kiss that took their breath away. House rested his forehead against hers and they stared at each other. "Still hungry?"

"Shut up, House," she said before reaching up and kissing him again, pulling him against her body.

When the need for air was once again too great, their lips broke apart and he stared down into her eyes. "I could take you right here," he said as he began to unbutton her blouse.

Cameron sighed as his warm hand slid inside her shirt and cupped her lace covered breast.

"And I could let you."

"But…"

"As much as I want you, and I do, I don't want it to happen in the kitchen."

House nodded, removed his hand and took hers. Tugging on it, he headed in the direction of what he assumed was her bedroom with Cameron following close behind.

"It's on the left," she said when he headed to the door on the right.

"What's in there?"

"The bathroom," she laughed.

"Ah. For the shower sex later. Check."

Cameron shook her head as she followed him into the bedroom and closed the door behind them. The room was dark, the only light coming in from the moon outside. The curtains swayed gently from the breeze of the open window.

Her queen size four post bed sat in the corner, covered in decorative pillows which House quickly shoved onto the floor. Cameron pulled up on his shirt and tugged it over his head at the same time her bra slid off and joined his shirt on the floor.

He was determined to get her clothes off as quickly as possible lest she change her mind, but it didn't seem that she would by the way she was unbuckling his belt and unbuttoning his jeans. She seemed to want him naked just as badly as he wanted her to be.

She pulled the covers back and climbed into bed. House climbed into the other side and they met in the middle. Their lips quickly found each other and his arms encircled her as he lowered her back against the pillows.

"Cameron…"

"Call me Allison."

When he opened his eyes again, he saw that she was looking up at him and her eyes were misty.

"What's wrong?" he asked as he stroked her cheek.

"Nothing. It's just...I've always wanted you...this…."

"And now you have me."

"It doesn't seem real."

"But it is," he said as he let his hand trail down the length of her body until it rested on her bare ass, then he pinched her.

Cameron gasped. "Ouch! House!"

He laughed and gently stroked the sore spot. "Call me Greg."

"I was hoping you'd say that," she said as she slid her hands up to his shoulders and pulled him down for another kiss. Her hands slid higher and he could feel her hands on his face, gently stroking his cheek.

"Yeah, yeah, but only when it's just us. Not at work. Capisce?"

She grinned and kissed him again. He kissed her back with the same intensity and things heated up quickly.

Lips and hands were everywhere as they touched, kissed and explored each other's bodies. When he couldn't stand it any longer, he opened the top drawer of her side table hoping to find condoms.

"I'm clean and I'm on the pill," she told him. "And I trust that you are."

"I'm not on the pill," he teased, earning a slap on his arm. "Hey!"

"I think we're good to bareback natural don't you? That is the term you use, isn't it?" she teased as she rolled onto her back and gave him a "come hither" smile. "I want to feel you. _All_ of you."

"How can I resist an offer like that?" he asked as he moved on top of her once more.

"You can't."

She reached up and gently stroked his cheek. "Make love to me, Greg."

He grinned at her and then they kissed softly, enjoying the intimacy of being so close. When their bodies finally joined, their kisses heated up as well.

House tried to think of something else while he made love to Cameron. Anything to prolong the incredible feelings that were cursing through his body. He didn't want it to end too quickly but it was becoming impossible to slow down. However, Cameron didn't seem to mind. She bucked her hips against his in the same rhythm, gripping his shoulders.

Then suddenly, she managed to flip him onto his back and continued to ride him harder and faster. "Yes! Oh God, Greg!" she cried out as she placed her hands on his chest for leverage and let herself go. The release was incredible and she threw her head back as the waves of euphoria rushed over her.

House felt his own release hit him much the same way, like a tidal wave crashing over them, and he went limp under her, closing his eyes and emitting a long, contented sigh.

"You're incredible," he murmured as she lay on top of him and nuzzled his neck.

"So are you."

Eventually Cameron had to move so House could clean himself up, and when he came back to the bedroom she was sitting up in bed holding the sheet up around herself.

"Kinda late for modesty," he said as he got back into bed with her. He tugged the sheet away and gently kissed the top of each breast.

"MMm...that's nice," Cameron sighed as she watched him continue to lavish attention on her. "So…I hate to be a buzzkill here but…"

"But you will anyway. What?"

"What happens now?"

"Well, I thought I'd start with burying my face in your breasts for awhile and then get into the fancy stuff…"

"No, that's not what I meant!" she laughed and gave him a playful slap on the shoulder.

"Keep slapping me like that and I'll tie you to those bedposts."

Cameron cocked her head to one side and smirked at him. "Is that a threat or a promise?"

He grinned. "It can be whatever you want it to be. I never took you for the bondage type, Dr. Cameron."

"It's always been a fantasy of mine. I guess I just haven't found anyone I trusted enough." Then she leveled him with a serious look. "Until now."

"Interesting. We might have to try that one day. But not now."

"I agree. Another time, definitely. That said, I need a shower."

"Now?"

"It's warm and we're all sweaty." She climbed out of bed and headed to the bathroom still naked and House admired the view.

She turned on the faucet, got the water hot enough and then started the spray. After she stepped in, House stood in the doorway and watched as the hot water and steam swirled around her and became aroused all over again. Then he stepped in next to her and closed the shower door behind him.

Cameron felt his arms slip around her waist as he pulled her against his body, his excitement growing harder by the minute.

"Again, House?" she giggled.

"What can I say? Seeing you all wet is hot. I'm a guy, it doesn't take much."

"So I see," she grinned as she turned around to face him. He gently pushed her against the wall and kissed her. She let out a squeal as he pinned her arms over her head and pressed inside of her. "Greg! Yes!"

His lips slid down to her neck and kissed a trail down across her throat and down to her breasts where he took her nipple in his warm mouth and swirled his tongue around it.

She wrapped her leg around House's hip as he continued to thrust upward and buried her fingers in his hair. He lavished attention on her other breast, his hands gripping her hips. She was thankful he was holding her because her legs felt weak and she worried she was going to fall. But he was strong and seemed to have no problems holding her up while he continued to buck his hips against hers.

"Greg! I'm close...oh God...faster!"

He braced one of his hands against the wall, wrapped his other arm around her waist for support and gave her what she needed until she cried out and went limp against him.

"MMm...that was hot," he murmured. Cameron leaned against the wall of the shower, her eyes half open and a satisfied grin on her face.

"More than. I didn't know you had it in you," she whispered as she grabbed the bottle of shower gel and poured it on a sponge.

"Neither did I."

After a quick shower, they returned to the bedroom and fell asleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**_A/N: As I mentioned before, this is the last chapter. But don't be sad, there is another fic in the works :) And no, it's not a sequel to this one, so don't get your hopes up. :)_ **

**Lyrics are from Love Runs Out by OneRepublic**

 **Chapter Ten**

 _I got my mind made up and I can't let go._

 _I'm killing every second 'til it sees my soul._

 _I'll be running, I'll be running,_

 _'Til the love runs out, 'til the love runs out._

When Cameron awoke the next morning, House wasn't in bed next to her and she sat up. Looking around she saw some of his clothes were still on the floor and let out the breath she didn't know she'd been holding. Grabbing her robe, she went looking for him and found him standing on her patio, leaning against the railing.

"Hey, couldn't sleep?" she asked as she joined him.

"Nope. I was hungry but you don't have much in the way of breakfast stuff."

"I know. I need to go shopping. I just haven't been home much."

"We can go out," he said with a shrug as he continued to stare out at the street below. He seemed preoccupied which made her stomach twist.

"Are you okay?" she asked, even though she didn't know if she wanted to hear the answer.

"Yeah. I'm good. Better than good, actually." He turned and looked at her, giving her a sexy grin, which made her relax. "So, breakfast?"

"Yeah. The diner in town makes really great waffles. I'll just get dressed."

The diner was nearly full of families enjoying breakfast. House hung back at the door as Cameron looked for an empty booth. There wasn't one but there were two open stools at the counter.

"We can sit at the counter or get something to go," she told him.

He tapped his cane and looked around. "Yeah, I'm not so hungry any more. Let's go."

Turning, he walked out. Cameron followed him with a slight frown. As she drove back, he stared out the window and didn't speak. He still seemed preoccupied; at least she hoped that was it. When they arrived back at her apartment, he walked over to his car, got in and drove away.

Cameron shook her head and slowly crossed to her building. She turned over the events of the night before and this morning. Was it something she said? Was she too aggressive? Chase often rebuffed her sexual advances and requests for more variety in their sex life. Had her talk of bondage bothered House? She unlocked her apartment and went in. She sighed as she went into her bedroom and stripped the bed. The scent of House overwhelmed her as she bundled up the sheets. She felt tears gather in her eyes and angrily blinked them away. Maybe all House wanted was a one night stand and now that he slept with her he was bored; ready to move on. That did seem to be his modus operandi. He did it with Cuddy while they were in college. He did it with Stacy when she came back. She knew he never used the same hooker twice.

She stomped out of the bedroom with the sheets tucked under one arm. Throwing them on the floor in the hallway, she opened the hall closet where her washer and dryer were hooked up. She flung open the washer, grabbed the detergent off the shelf, pored it in and threw in the sheets. She set the wash cycle, slammed the lid shut and stalked out to the kitchen. Opening the fridge, she saw the container of leftover pasta and pulled it out. Then, grabbing a fork, she went out to the living room and ate the cold pasta in front of the TV.

How could she have been so stupid? House didn't do relationships; not since his disastrous one with Stacy. Tucking her legs beneath her, she tossed the pasta container and fork on the couch. The only lasting relationship House had was with Wilson and most of the time that was nothing short of a train wreck. Why did she choose men who were so wrong for her? Looking back, all her romantic relationships failed for one reason or another but they all did because of her. With a snort of disgust, she turned the TV off and turned on her stereo. OneRepublic's _Love Runs Out_ began to play and she turned it up. She got clean sheets out of the linen closet and went into her bedroom. Once the bed was made, she went into the bathroom and began to clean it. As she scrubbed the tub, the music stopped and she sat back on her heels. Great. Was her stereo broken?

"What are you doing?" House asked from the doorway.

Cameron gasped and jumped up, her hand on her heart. "Jesus! You scared the shit out of me!" she panted as her heart rate slowed. She frowned. "What are you doing here? Last night was a one time thing. Right?"

He looked confused and she noticed her held an overnight bag in his hand. "No," he told her. "That diner was too crowded and all I could think about was you and bondage. So, I went home to get some goodies. I also brought some stuff so I can stay here for a few days." He tilted his head. "What did you think?"

She folded her arms and looked at him. "I thought," she said in a low, quiet voice, "that last night was a one night stand for you. You didn't say anything. You just took off. What was I supposed to think?"

House knew the look on her face all too well. He rubbed his hand over his face. "How long have you known me?" he asked. "Communication isn't always my strong point. I figured after last night that you knew I'd be back." He shrugged. "My bad." Leaning forward, he looked into her eyes. "Did you know your eyes turn dark blue when you're really pissed off? It's sexy. I like it." He smiled at her. "Come on, you can't stay mad at me. You love me, remember?"

"I have to put the sheets in the dryer." She turned on her heel and left the room as House watched. He followed her and decided to go into the bedroom. Giving her space seemed like a good idea. Sitting down on the bed, he put his cane between his legs and rested his forehead on the handle. So, he screwed up. He assumed she knew he would be back. Why did she have to be so pissed off, though? It was an honest misunderstanding. Then, for a moment, he thought about how it might seem from her point of view. This was not something he did. He didn't care what other people thought of him or the things he did. Yet, he cared that Cameron got the wrong idea and thought…

"I'm an asshole," he sighed.

"Yes, you are," Cameron told him from the doorway.

She crossed the room and sat down on the bed beside him. "I'm not psychic. You will have to talk to me. Communicate."

Titling his head slightly, he looked at her. Her long blonde hair was piled on her head and a few silky tendrils framed her face. Her eyes gleamed a bright blue. He relaxed because that meant she was happy.

"I can't promise anything," he muttered. "But, I will try."

A sly smile curved her soft pink lips. "What goodies did you bring?"

He pointed to his bag with his cane. She got up and bent over to open it. House admired the view of her long slim legs and the slight curve of her ass revealed by her shorts. She stood up and held two red and black silk ties in her hands.

"Take your clothes off," she ordered.

House's eyes widened at the authoritative tone of her voice. He rose and stripped his clothes and shoes off leaving them in a heap on the floor.

"Get on the bed," she said as she advanced on him.

He got on the bed and laid back. She took his right hand and tied it to the bedpost and then did the same with his left. She arranged the pillows comfortably beneath his head and one beneath his right leg. Then she went to her dresser and opened a drawer. He strained forward but couldn't see what she pulled out. When she turned around, she held a small leather flogger. House's cock sprang to attention as she slapped it lightly against the palm of her hand. She sat beside him on the bed and smacked his belly. The leather fringes stung but in the best way possible. He groaned as fire raced through his veins. The ends of the flogger brushed against his mouth. She stood up on the bed and placed her feet on either side of his hips. His breathing quickened and sweat beaded on his skin as she slowly removed her clothes. When all her clothes joined his on the floor, she ran the whip over her breasts as she released her hair from its bun. It tumbled over her shoulders and back like a golden waterfall. She knelt down and touched her tongue to the tip of his cock while she ran the leather fringes across his balls.

"Holy fucking Christ!" he moaned.

She moved her left foot and sank down beside him. Using her mouth, tongue and the whip, she brought him to an explosive release. As he tried to catch his breath, she untied his hands and laid down beside him. She put the whip and ties on the bedside table and rested her head on his shoulder. Thanks to the endorphins from his orgasm, his leg barely twinged as he shifted and pulled her on top of his damp body. She tucked her head beneath his chin and stroked his shoulders with her fingertips. Her thighs rested on his hips while her calves and feet molded to his outer thighs. Her breasts pressed against his chest and her pelvis slid against the base of his belly. He languidly stroked her hair.

"Let me know if I'm too heavy," she breathed against his skin.

"You're just right," he assured her. "Just stay like this."

Her left hand moved down his chest and her fingers lightly rubbed his warm skin.

"So-" she began.

"I want to live with you," he interrupted. "Here, my apartment or somewhere else. I don't care. Just stay with me."

She seemed to melt against him. "For how long?"

"Until one of us is dead or you get sick of me," he told her as his fingers combed through her hair.

"Until death it is, then."

 **THE END**


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